I’m almost done!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am truly blessed.  In four hours I’m going for my final chemo treatment and I made it through relatively unscathed.  I had some nausea, couldn’t sleep, a little anxiety (maybe a lot), pain in my hips and legs, lost my hair, my eye brows and eye lashes are thinning, get hot flashes (who sweats by just standing there when it’s in the60’s?  Me!), have kind of lost my memory (my notes and lists are way more important than they used to be), am at a loss for words daily (because I can’t remember words, not because I’m shocked or sad) and if I look back through my blog I’m sure I’d find some other stuff I didn’t like dealing with. Some of the lasting effects might be a little difficult to accept – possible menopause at 37, loss of my reproductive abilities (but I don’t know if we wanted more kids anyway, although cute they are a lot of work!), an intense surgery with painful recovery, a new body (sounds great but might be difficult to accept.  We have to wait and see) and I’m sure other things that I don’t know about yet. 

BUT this treatment process has been way easier than I expected.  I know I could’ve gotten sick, had extreme nausea, gotten the flu, been admitted into the hospital, been alone, had no support from family and friends and had to work. And I met some amazing people along the way: 

·         Jerry, my friend that started chemo the same day as me.  We’ve made plans for dinner on the 30^th to celebrate that we will NOT be at chemo that day. 

·         My doctors – I’m looking forward to my appointment with Dr Jones, my breast surgeon, or “current surgeon” as I like to call him.  Dr Jones and his nurses have been with me since Day 1.  Jerry and I agreed last night that they’re office is warm and pleasant which is hard to imagine for an office where I was told I have Breast Cancer. 

·         My Oncologist – Dr Barnhill whom I’ve talked about a lot.  I gave Dr Barnhill a little gift yesterday.  Her hands are always cold and she talks about those pocket hand warmers all the time. Well I found some and brought one to her and she hugged me.  The little things mean the most sometimes!

·         My chemo nurses – we had a rough start the first day of chemo but that quickly changed and I look forward to seeing them.

·         The people I’ve met at church.  Some of whom give me a smile or hug on Sundays and some who have taken me under their wing and really reached out and become my friends.

·         Shannon, my “person” in Arizona as of last week by way of Nevada by way of CA whom I was put in touch with by best friends in OR who are from CA J.  Yes, that path is necessary.  I’ve never met Shannon in person or even spoken to her on the phone but we were put in contact with each other and have emailed and texted A LOT.  She went through Breast Cancer a few years ago and I can’t say how much she has helped me through this.  I don’t ever want to have to be this person for anyone because I want cancer to Go Away but I am here for anyone who ever needs me. 

So I do feel blessed through all of this.  If I question where God has been I remember he doesn’t give us more than we can handle (which is hard to remember or accept sometimes) and he has made me to be one that can take something like Cancer and give it the bird with a smile on my face.  Oh wait, God might not like the bird J 

So here I go, about to get ready for my final chemo treatment.  My mom will drop me off so I can try to sleep once I get my straight shot of Benadryl (Missy, my chemo nurse, suggested I drink cranberry juice while she’s giving me the shot so I don’t taste the awful chemical that I tried to get away from the first time but was unable to since it’s going into my neck about 3 inches from my mouth and nose.  This worked but we forgot the juice last time).  Then my mom will come back around 12:30 with some lunch (I haven’t touched that boxed lunch they deliver since my 2^nd treatment) and will hang out with me while I finish chemo.  Tonight will be good so I think Bobby and I might go to a movie.  Thursday is my moms birthday so I think we’re taking Micah on a Street Car ride and to lunch (sounds like Micah’s birthday huh?) and I’ll go for my white blood cell shot.  The Jazz Fest lineup also comes out on Thursday,  Yippee!  (For those who go, you know what this means!!)  Friday the pain will probably start in the evening and I’ll deal with that until Tuesday.  It sure is nice to know what to expect, I hope Taxol doesn’t throw me a curve ball this time.

On a side note, my surgery was moved up a day to Feb 5^th.  I could go on and on about this (poor Katie has heard it all!) but will save it. 

Happy Hump Day everyone!